Beer Flight

Beer Flight is a completely ridiculous and interminable thumbing of my nose at multi-serialism, complete with involuntary audience participation, composed in 2022 for a Post-Tonal Music Theory assignment when I was getting my Master's degree, and submitted appropriately enough on April 1st.

This piece is scored for two trumpets, horn, and tuba. The 12-tone series used for this composition is:
6 10 1 3 11 8 2 0 4 9 7 5
The duration of notes will be based upon the number of eighth note beats, starting with 0. So, 0 is an eighth note, 1 is a quarter note, and so on. The duration of a row's notes will be determined by the row beneath it or adjacent to it on the matrix. So, if the player is currently playing P4, the duration of the notes in the row will be determined by P6. If the player is playing I8, the duration will be determined by I6. Each player will play all twelve rows of the matrix, but the four players will travel the matrix in different directions. The first trumpet will play P, the second trumpet will play I, the horn will play R, and the tuba will play RI.
To the left of each player there should be a metal bucket. To the right of each player there should be a small table, with twelve 2 or 3 oz. glasses filled with a variety of beer selections. As each player completes their row, they shout the name of a beer and chug it, corresponding to the final note in that row (indicated in the score). The glasses must be labeled by number and filled with the following:

0 – Stout
1 – Doppelbock
2 – Porter
3 – Lambic
4 – Bock
5 – IPA
6 – Dunkelweizen
7 – Wheat
8 – Amber
9 – Kolsch
10 – Lager
11 - Schwarzbier

**Involuntary Interactive Audience Experience**
Each row of the theater will be equipped with a mystery box on the back of it. The boxes must be black, with a menacingly pink question mark painted onto them. The boxes will be distributed at random throughout the theater and in no predictable pattern. Whenever each row of the piece ends, the mystery boxes corresponding to that final number of the row will open, at which point a fun and exciting surprise will be launched at the audience member sitting behind that box. On the inside of the box, after the surprise has been revealed, a painted number inside will show the audience member which box they had, ultimately revealing to them P0, allowing them to share in the fun experience of 12-tone serialism.

The boxes will be spring-loaded with the following items, to be launched at the appropriate time according to the final number in the row (as indicated for the stage manager in the score):

0 - Banana Cream Pie
1 - A Live Chicken
2 – Gummy Worms
3 - Silly String
4 – Strawberry milk and Rainbow Confetti
5 - Shaving Cream
6 - A mixture of Lucky Charms, Rice Chex, Golden Grahams, Cheerios, Wheaties, Apple Jacks, Frosted Flakes, Grape Nuts, Fruit Loops, Cocoa Puffs, Frankenberry, and Cap'n Crunch. (Multi-Cerealism).
7 - Melted Rocky Road Ice Cream
8 - Lime Green Jell-O
9 - Cheese Whiz
10 - A full Surf 'n Turf Dinner
11 - KFC's Eleven Herbs and Spices

***Additional performance instructions:***

When a player shouts "Amber" any audience member with that name may slap the person next to them.

When "IPA" is shouted, any Canadians are permitted to leave and use the restroom.