Internalised by Naz & Ella published on 2021-04-07T21:12:29Z Internalised is a song about the fear of “coming out” to yourself, drawing on our personal experiences as queer women. We wanted to explore the manifestation of internalised homophobia within a relationship, highlighting the guilt and shame it can evoke, as well as the inner turmoil with regards to gender expression. In this song, we share our story in in the hope that it will help bring solace to other queer people going through a similar experience. // Lyrics // Not sure who I am Know who I’m meant to be Which story today It’s getting harder to breathe Long hair, flowing dress Am I the woman society wants me to be? Is the threat real Or is it in my head? I wish I could read their minds Come clean I’ll set me free Is it all internalised? Girlfriend A word I can’t get off my tongue Can I call you my friend What does it matter anyway? Drop your hand Look the other way Too many years of hiding in the shade Wrapped in shame Is the threat real Or is it in my head? I wish I could read their minds Come clean I’ll set me free Is it all internalised? I want to leave my head Tear down the walls Hold your hand in mine Out in the light And for the first time in my life I’m proud to call you mine For the first time in my life I’m proud to call you mine To call you, to call you mine To call you, to call you mine (I feel the shame melt away I feel the shame melt away) To call you, to call you mine To call you, to call you mine (I feel the shame melt away I feel the shame melt away) I feel the shame melt away (Hold me close) I feel the shame melt away --- (DE)HUMANISE EP released 7 May 2021 ℗ & © Naz & Ella 2021 Written, recorded & produced by Nasreen Toorabally and Ella Patenall All live instruments and vocals performed by Nasreen Toorabally and Ella Patenall except cello in ‘Flux’ played by Polina Kermesh Drums programmed by Dan Lucas at Anchor Baby Recording Mixed by Dan Lucas at Anchor Baby Recording Mastered by Charlie Francis Genre Alternative Rock