I was adopted by my aunt and uncle, I was born with a large amount of drugs in my system , before getting adopted my birth mother picked me up and slammed me to the ground giving me a compound fracture to the skull, my whole life I been not wanted , not welcomed, not like anyone els,This hasn't stopped me for trying, I refuse to die and give up on any thing , I got nice things because I worked for them, I hate that I have to explain who I am , the only thing you need to understand is I have more talent and skill than most and if I dont like you I turn into a ghost, I've had content online for many years, unfortunately people are scared of what they don't understand there for never been contacted by anyone witch is weird to because suddenly everyone thinks they know me but in reality no one does, it's easy to see stuff but it's hard to picture the truth , never been one to do stuff for the sole purpose of my self I've took care of others, I can't have people building road blocks and shutting me out soly because there scared of what I am, and what I am is a skilled individual with talents far much advanced than anyone on payroll currently lmfao( Part two ) 17 years ago I was dating someone they told me that they were on pregnancy medication they lied, and regardless how you fill about this I did it , never been married, but I had to protect myself, I wasn't going to get done that way again it made me fill like less of a person she shut me out of her life made fill like I was a bad person, change her numbers on me and the times I was able to get a hold of her it was all about signing my rights away, so yeah I lied , fill how you want , I was hurt and had to protect myself : I am broken: I am lost : I refuse to die give up or quite, I learned how to tell if a person is out to hurt me and I refuse to let them do so, ( part three )
reverting back to child hood
( my aunt my mother) My mother was verbally abusive as well as physical abusive, I was slap/ thrown into things as well as choked, I was repeatedly called stupid/ dumb, and told I wasn't smart enough to archive anything this took me the longest time to conquer, it was hard/ still hard
at times but I've been feeling good lately doing good as well, most of my life women has been negative figures, there's trigger words that I will not disclose with anyone, but you could probably figure them out but don't please, Id rather stay content and at peace with myself, But I truly fill like I owe it to my son at least an explanation on why I'm the way I am and why I was never able to be around, Im not an alcoholic nor am I on drugs though I can put a show on for sure if I need to, any who's my heart is open to you your friend Johnny Bl@ze: Part 4 ( my father's son )
my dad was a veteran he served in the Vietnam war, he was really quiet soft spoken and took my mother's constant nagging and negativity he truly deserves a reward for just the second part of that alone, he worked all my life he had his CDL , and we he would talk about locations and directions he would use only numbers, he also taught me not to hit a lady no matter how mean or abusive they are the hard way at that , one evening me and my mom got into it like normal I was about 14 years old at the time and Id had enough I was going to hurt my mother I had her pinned down and as I was going to hurt her he rushed in the door and kicked me off of her, he put a whooping on me that I will never forget about, but I learned my lesson for what I tried to do, it's never ok to hurt someone just because you know that you can, Just walk away , even though some times it's harder than it seems to do that, I've been through a lot but I'm truly grateful for what I've learned from it, if you have family still living you need to mend relationship with them before there gone ,
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