Like It Used To

I don’t even wanna do it
I just wanna say screw it
Taking everything I had like the blunt I blew it
Can I make it through this
Can i make it back I don’t know
Got the demons at my throat
Every night I cry and choke
Got a pillow puddle
Always stuck up in a muddle
Always up in my own bubble
I’m Debating taking shuttles
Get away, we always struggle
I can feel your hate every time we cuddle
Even tho it’s subtle
Shake me up I gotta buckle up
Everything I gotta juggle up
But you don’t give a fuck
In my notes I got rebuttals but I never muscle up
Get this out I while I can, get a plan, gotta huddle up

This smoke don’t hit like it used to
Tryna cope I don’t know what to do
Pressing call but it won’t go through
All my walls cave in, panic too

I just wanna smoke away, get the shovel, digging my own grave
Don’t belong in any place
What u know about the pain,
what u got all in ur brain
Wishing anything would change but it all stay the same
Got this panic that I will be alone forever, nobody get it,
dropping tears all on my sweater, got ur message and I read it
Staring out the window at the weather,
everything I dread it
Running to my bed I’m not safe there i bet it

I don’t even wanna do it
I just wanna say screw it
Taking everything I had like the blunt I blew it
Can I make it through this
Can it make it back I don’t know
Got the demons at my throat
Every night I cry and
This smoke don’t hit like it used to
Tryna cope I don’t know what to do
Pressing call but it won’t go through
All my walls cave in, panic too

Produced by oceanash